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There have many previous steps taken by myself before my meeting with ACIM.  Not that I didn't want more support early on and I recognize now why it was the way it was for me.  Me being unaware basically of my individual responsibility for myself.  I didn't understand  I was existing in my own world of misperception.  I couldn't really start forgiving, say in alignment, until I recognized more through my actual experiences. This including my idea of any misstep.  Each step was simply necessary for me.    

My meeting with ACIM and acceptance for atonement has continuallly brought me to  remembering and experiencing myself as pretty much brand new each and every day.  Yes, of course with many new things to teach myself through my experiences with the challenges that come along too.  The Miracle is always available.   I continuously notice the bright improvement through much peace and joyfulness that comes in doing this for myself.  I am teaching myself through God's plan.   

 I love the expression of remembering perfection through forgiveness.   This idea  came to me tonight as I was out for some fresh air and feeling immersed in so much gratitude for my individual ongoing dicoveries in this Miracle Path of Forgiveness.  

Misperception being misperception makes misperception it's nature. So it is hard to see through illusion with a mind of misperception.  To me that is a simple way to express myself about it now and clearly know that is why atonement is necessary and available for indivdual experience!  I never realized what salvation meant untiil I started feeling the changes within me and witnessing myself new each day.  Although I have been doing so much less outwardly for some time now,  I have felt fulfilled within each day too.  Not able to say if some of the extreme experiences early on were necessary.  I guess they were "normal" in the leaving of my world behind at the time.  And in newness, I honestly don't think about normal anymore.  That was part of my past, but I still want to relate to those who are interested too. We are companions always.  Although I have found that doesn't have much to do with alot of my old ideas of being at all.  I keep asking to be shown.

I know I am  fully connected, and peacefully to everything and everyone of course!.   I give as God asks me to give.   I experience happiness in maintaining peace of mind for myself and living a life of no opposites as I continue on in atonement for myself day by day.   Trusting God is directing me in everything along with everyone, whereever I find myself.  This is my living now.  God directs me, otherwise I wouldn't know.   I hold only the thoughts I think with God in my mind.

I realize now that not even my mom or dad could have helped me out of misperception.  She passed on a few years prior to my turmoils, and of course that experience of  itself being extremely difficult.  And I also understand  now that they of course couldn't even relate to me if they weren't having the real experience of  this themselves yet.  

So I had gone through some ideas of forgiving early on after her passing but not with any intention other than say the immediate relief.  It's hard to put words too it actually now because it is all meaningless in reality.  But early on,  I forgave my mom and dad for many things as I remembered past traumas of childhood that had been disguised.  I did have some very blessed forgiving moments with my dad before he passed on that were like precious gifts to me.  

The biggest difference for me now is that I recognize she couldn't have helped me understand anything about atonement.  Because it was not something she accepted for herself yet.  The thought came to me today too that it was like my mom saying to me: I brought you into this world but now it was up to me to find my way out of it!  And that is a light hearted way to express it, but this also has been my experience. Although me and my mom were always able to joke around quite a bit too!   It is just my individual undoing that another is unable to do for me.  God is with each one of us in the same way.  His plan is perfect.  He is Risen, Indeed!

As Gods light becomes apparent and  I see things and say things with a light heart now too because misperception is cleared out of my way.  I see everyone in this idea of One God light, in no opposite in love joy and peace, as in no stranger, no conflict, no competition, etc...    It's like illusion  becomes meaningless and then it clears the way to see through to perfect creation experience! Meeting with forgiveness and then somehow a shift takes place and I recognize it..  It is a miracle.  God's plan for salvation is a miraculous individual course!  Although, God only gives to each individual in the same universal way.  I find this so more than interesting...so satisfying.  Peace to you dear, beloved!  Delighted to share with you always.  Jeannine